Everywhere

I see you everywhere.

My mind wanders to you unwittingly.  Every time I am happy, sad, or indifferent, I think of you.

I wonder where you are, what you are doing, and what you are thinking.  I fear for you, I am excited for you, and I miss you.

I love your hands... your eyes.... your laugh.... your smile.  I love your sense of humor and your way of thinking.  I love it when you wear your glasses.... and grow facial hair.  And the faraway look in your eyes.... the look that hints  of a story still untold.

I wish I was the brightest star in the sky, maybe then I could get your attention.  I did once, and for a moment I flew.   I had never felt so lucky, so happy, or more in love.

And so sad, to be in silence.  To wish for you, to think of you, and dream of you.  Alone, forever.

You are nowhere to be found.  But you are everywhere to me.

--For Ryan, you are forever loved.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zR7xR9jfgVs

'Love can make you do things you never dreamed possible'

I got lost, couldn't find my way
And I guess there's nothing more to say
Love can make you blind, make you act so strange
But I'm here and here I will stay

So everyday I cry
Yes everyday I fall
Do you ever wonder why, why I love everything about you

But everyday I say I'll try to make my heart be still
'Til then every way there is to cry, ourselves to sleep we will

It picked me up, knocked me off my feet
I've got no way to explain
Still I love you, love you, love you but this fire inside
Will never see the light of day

So everyday goes by
And everyday I fall
It makes me wonder why,
My life's worth nothing without you

But everyday I say I'll try
To make my heart be still
'Cause every way there is to cry,
Ourselves to sleep, we will

You'll never know, no, no, no ,no ,no
You'll never know just how close we were
You'll never know, no, no, no ,no ,no
You'll never know
No you'll never see

The book closes and we try to forget
But I know that things won't change
How we feel, how life goes on
And that seems so strange

And so the light fades away
Try, try, try as I may
I can't stop thinking about you
It seems my life's worth nothing without you

But everyday I say I'll try
To make my heart be still
'Til then every way there is to cry,
Ourselves to sleep, we will

Everyday, everyday you know I try so hard
Everyday, everyday it gets a little harder

"There's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. Its called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone? We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly loved that man for years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas', the worst Birthday's, New Years Eve's brought in by tears and Valium. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back." 
- Kate Winslet as Iris in 'The Holiday'